Happiness, Thy Name Is Eric
by RRatedauthor
Summary: Continues roughly where "I know What Happened To You Last Night" ended. Jeff is determined to act on his feelings for Eric, but can he handle rejection? Can he also handle that he's competing with his own brother for the man of his dreams?
1. Drafted!

Happiness, Thy Name Is Eric

Theodore Long took centre stage and addressed the raucous Philadelphia crowd.

"It's with great pleasure that ECW anoounces that with it's final draft pick, it selects... Jeff Hardy!"

In the locker room, Jeff fell off his chair.

"Praise the Lord!" He shouted, raising both fists to the sky.

"Looks like Matt's in trouble now." Shannon Moore giggled.

"Damn straight." Jeff stated. After the Royal Rumble screwjob, he been waiting to get his hands on his brother. But what was really going on? Jeff couldn't admit it to anyone else, but beating the tar out of Matt was secondary. Lately, and this was the hard part, he couldn't get his mind off newcomer Eric Stryker. At first he thought it was just a schoolgirl crush,. But the more he hung around him, the more he wanted something a lot more than that. He'd had vivid dreams of him almost every night and usually awoke in a cold sweat, his heart pounding and his cock throbbing.

Leaving the RAW locker room, he went down the hall to where the ECW wrestlers were chilling.

"Welcome to our little family." Tommy Dreamer greeted him.

"Thanks." He replied, feeling like the new kid in school. He looked around at this future allies and enemies, trying to find one person in particular.

"Looking for Matt?" Dreamer guessed

"Yeah." Jeff lied.

"He's in the ring." Tommy pointed to a monitor. "He's in the first ever Tables-Ladders-Chairs tuxedo match."

"Did you just say a tables-ladders-charis tuxedo match?" At first, Jeff thought his ears were playing tricks on him.

"Yeah. That's what I said."

"Who's winning?" He asked

"I dunno. It looks pretty even to me." Tommy pointed to the monitor.

Jeff watched, torn as for whom he should be cheering for. If he was to stay in character, he should hope that Eric would destroy Matt. But, since the only way to win was to strip your opponent down to his underwear, part of him hoped Matt would be victorious. Maybe it was because he wanted to see Eric almost-naked, or maybe he didn't want to see Matt in that state, he wasn't sure.

Feeling a slight case of deja-vu, Jeff watched Eric toss Matt onto a ladder and grab a chair. He lined up the shot and this time, Matt didn't move. Standing over a prone Matt Hardy, Eric proceeded to rip, tear, and otherwise shred the tuxedo. He grinned evilly when he went for the pants.

"I don't think so..." Matt kicked Eric low and followed up with a suplex onto a table. He pounced on Eric and started tearing the clothing from him.

"Yeah!!!" Jeff shouted, quite by accident.

"Whose side are you on?" Tommy asked

"Sorry, I'm so used to cheerin' for Matt." Jeff blushed, sitting down again.

"You better keep your story straight. People already think weird things about you..."

"Whatever." Jeff returned his focus to the match. Matt was down to his shirt and pieces of his pants, while Eric only had his bow tie and cummerbund left. Jeff tried to focus on the match itself, but found he couldn't take his eyes of Eric's chiseled form, especially in what little he was wearing at that moment.

Eric climbed the turnbuckle and the camera caught him dead center. From where he sat, it appeared that Eric was pointing directly at Jeff. He flew, doing a perfect imitation of the Swanton. Matt was dazed and Eric ripped the rest of the clothes from his body. Thankfully (or not) Matt wasn't goin' commando that night.

"Here is your winner... Eric Hardy!"

Eric celebrated with the crowd by throwing pieces of the two tuxedos into the crowd, followed by the rest of his own suit.

Running to the back, he made a directly dash for the locker room. Unlike some members of the company, showing off more than he had to was not something he liked to do very often.

Grabbing a towel, he quickly wrapped it around his waist and headed for the showers. Trying to look inconspicuous, Jeff followed.

"Hey..." He didn't want to seem like he was up to something, even though he was.

"What the..." Eric turned around, his towel flopping open for the briefest of moments, but that was enough. "You always sneak up on the guys in the shower, Hardy?"

"Only when they're really hot." Jeff replied

"I guess I should take that as a compliment." Eric retorted

"I guess." Jeff looked down at his shoes, trying not to go ga-ga any more than usual.

"Is there something I can do for you?" Eric asked

Jeff's head snapped up. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, you must want something from me pretty bad if you're bothering me in the shower, right?"

"Well, yeah."

"Well, spit it out then."

"I was wondering if... y'know... maybe, after the show you'd like to... " Jeff felt more embarrassed now than the time he'd been caught behind the barn with the girl down the street.

"Are you asking me out?" Eric asked, the tone clearly indicating that this was not something he was expecting either.

"No. I mean, I just wanted to maybe have a drink or... 'coz you're always hanging out with Matt..."

Thank God Matt entered the shower himself, saving Jeff any further embarrassment.

"Great match, Matt." Eric said

"You too." Matt replied

"Yeah." Jeff added, almost at a whisper.

Matt looked over at his younger brother, smiling. "It's a good thing we don't have to keep up the charade all the time, isn't it?" He was referring to their animosity, that even had to be maintained to a degree around the boys in the back.

"If the family reunion is done, I'm gonna get cleaned up." Eric tossed his towel aside and stepped under the hot water. Jeff's eyes bugged out and he had to force himself to step back instead of running into the shower with him. He wanted to feel his body against him, the friction building to an indescribably messy conclusion...

"You still starin' at me?" Eric's sharp command snapped Jeff out of his dream.

"No..." Jeff whined

"Oh." If Jeff didn't know better, he'd say that Eric sounded disappointed.

"Then pass me my towel please."

"Sure, dude."

Once he was re-wrapped, Eric stepped out. "Are you gonna stand there forever?"

Jeff turned away, dejected.

"Cause you got until I get dressed to make yourself presentable."

"What?"

"Our date?" Eric briskly towelled his shoulder-length hair. "I don't kiss on the first night though."

"Me neither."

"Then you better take care of that anaconda in your pants before we go." Eric glanced down, as did Jeff. To his horror, he was fully hard. This seemed to happen way too much lately.

Leaving a red-faced Jeff yet again, Eric walked back into the locker room. He tried adjusting himself, but he couldn't will his organ to cooperate. He was to the point where he though he was going to have to rub one out, when it started to deflate on its own.

"There is a God." He whispered

No one even looked at him when he stepped out of the showers.

"Enjoy your shower?" Elijah Burke couldn't resist cracking a joke, albeit a bad one.

"Knock it off, Burke. He's just making himself look good." Matt jumped to his defense.

"Little Jeffy has a date? How cuuuuuuute?"

"Did you just call me cute?" Eric walked over, his babyface niceness gone. In its place was a look that could melt steel.

"No... I meant that... it was cute that Jeffy had a date, not who he was dating..."

"Elijah, I'm gonna give you some advice... don't put your two cents in unless you have exact change." Eric winked at Jeff. "Are you buying the first round?"

"Yes, sir." With exaggerated formality, Jeff saluted.

"And knock that 'sir' crap off. You make me feel old." Eric smacked Jeff on the seat. "Now let's go before people get any more of a wrong idea."

Laughing, they strolled out the door.

"Hey, Matt. What's up with your brother?" Elijah asked

Matt looked a little bewildered. "I'm not sure."

"I mean, he's not gay is he?"

"I don't think so." Matt answered, looking cockeyed at Burke. "But Jeff's done a lot of strange things in his life."

"So, how long have you had a crush on me?" Eric asked in the parking lot. "My car?"

"Please..." Jeff loved driving in Eric's Viper with the top down, with the wind rushing through his hair, at 200-plus miles per hour.

"Well?" Eric paused to wipe a smudge off the metallic paint job on the trunk.

"Huh?" Jeff was busy staring at the car.

"You haven't answered my question. How long have you had a crush on me?"

"What makes you think I have a crush on you?" Jeff answered with his own question.

"How dense do you think I am, Jeff? You've been hanging around me like a little puppy since the first day I was here."

"Oh. I didn't think it was that noticeable."

"A guy with more hair colours than the rainbow is talking about subtlety?" Eric laughed "That's a good one."

He backed out of the parking lot and floored it. They drove through town, hair flying, sometimes barely keeping the car on the road.

"Where are we going?" Jeff demanded

"There's a club on the outskirts of town I wanna go to. A friend's band is performing tonight."

"Cool."

"I thought you like the idea. Given what I've heard of Peroxwhy?gen, you'll probably enjoy these guys." Eric popped in a CD. "This is them."

Jeff listened. It was a little lighter than what he played, but still heavy enough to get in a good mood.

"They're called NCDR." Eric answered "Don't ask me what it stands for."

Jeff shrugged, snuggling down in the seat a little.

"Don't get too comfy." Eric playfully slugged him. "We'll be there in five."

"'Kay, dude."

Eric turned into the parking lot of what looked like your run of the mill bar. Faded clapboard siding, a rooster weathervane, and corrigated tin roofing made it even more hillbilly.

"Don't let the outside fool ya." Eric noticed Jeff's bewilderment. "It's quite the place."

Jeff looked over, a questioning expression on his face. Eric laughed again.

"You may be good a lot of shit, but the People's Eyebrow isn't one of them."

Jeff pouted. "Show's what you know."

Eric turned his head, concerned that he had really hurt the Enigma's feelings. "Let me tell you a little something about me. Sometimes, well actually quite often, I open my mouth before my brain has a chance to tell me not to. I'm not trying to put you down."

Jeff looked over. From his expression, Eric seemed sincere.

"Maybe I should stop being so sensitive." Again, he tried the Rock's look.

"That one was better." Eric replied "Let's go get drunk."

A few minutes after eight, NCDR took the stage.

"Good evening Cincinnati! We are NCDR and we're here to make you forget how expensive the drinks are!"

Laughter.

"Just kidding. Enjoy the show. Please try the fish."

Eric stared at the remnants of his dinner. "I hope that's not what we ate."

"It looked a little fishy to me." Jeff replied

"That's what I was afraid of." Eric faked a burp.

Jeff laughed.

Once the band got into their set, Jeff and Eric had to shout just to hear each other. So any serious discussion was put on hold until their show ended. Eric excused himself midway through; he was experiencing a severe headache. He'd been to this place many times before and never felt this bad ever. He really hoped it wasn't dinner.

He pointed at himself and in the direction of the bathroom to make Jeff understand. He nodded sympathetically; he too was feeling a little off.

Eric eventually returned, still feeling ill. But he was determined to enjoy the rest of the performance.

"You okay?" Jeff yelled

Eric made a "so-so" gesture.

Jeff tapped his watch in a "You wanna leave now?" motion.

"I'll live." Eric mouthed

"Folks, we are NCDR... on drums, Erik Draven..."

The crowd cheered.

"On base... Lee Isley..."

More cheers.

"On rhythm guitar, Tommy Oliver..."

Still more cheers.

"And finally, the man without whom this wouldn't be necessary... Joel Belanger!" It was the drummer who did this bit."

"We'd like to thank you all for comin' out. Have a good night and we'll see you again real soon."

Tha band played their final number, a cover of Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'". As soon as it was done, Eric got up.

"If you wanna stay and have another drink or two, that's cool, but I gotta get outta here now!"

"That's fine. We gotta show tomorrow anyway." Jeff slid out of the booth behind Eric.

"You need a drive somewhere?"

"You sure you're okay?" Jeff looked concerned.

"Maybe you should drive." Eric tossed his keys to Jeff.

"Sure." Under most circumstances, Jeff would've been thrilled to drive, but he was starting to worry about Eric. He didn't look real well at all.

"Where are you staying, Eric? I'll drive you there." Jeff said

"Same hotel you are." Eric mumbled "But I don't think I'm gonna... urp!"

Eric leaned over the side of the car and vomited.

"Fuck that, I'm taking you to a doctor!"

Jeff, I'm..." Eric threw up yet again.

"No arguments... just try to keep it under control until we get there." Jeff spun the wheels and drove out of the parking lot as fast as he could. It was only a ten minute drive to the nearest clinic, but Eric was belligerent.

"Just find me a Seven-Eleven and I'll be fine. I'll get some Gravol or some shit like that." Eric heaved deeply, trying not to be sick again.

"Okay, but on one condition... you're staying with me tonight." Jeff quickly did a U-turn. They'd just passed one such store.

"Fine. Whatever. And something to wash it down with as well." Eric sighed, feeling his gorge lurch with every bump in the road.

After what seemed like forever, Jeff pulled in to the parking lot.

"I'll be back in a minute." Jeff was in and out in less than two minutes.

"Here."

Eric took two of the pills and washed them down with several swallows of water.

"Better?"

Eric looked over at him, the green tinge on his face matching the colour of his shirt. "As... long... as... I... breathe... slowly..."

Jeff drove as quickly as he could to get them both back to the hotel, only stopping once for Eric to empty his stomach. It was mostly dry heaves now, whatever had been causing his discomfort had long been expelled.

"I'm on the twelfth floor." Eric sighed during one of his less nauseous moments.

"You wanna stay with me?" Jeff asked quickly. A little too quicky for Eric's liking.

"Jeff, thanks, but no thanks." Eric responded. He soon realized how harsh he'd sounded.

"I was just trying to be nice. Dammit, why does everyone think I'm trying to get with them when I just want to be friends!"

"Jeff, I didn't mean it that way." Eric leaned back against the seat, fighting the rising bile in his throat. "Actually, maybe it would be a good idea if I wasn't alone until this stuff starts working."

"You really mean it?"

"I'm not promising anything." Eric answered "But if I didn't trust you at least a little, you wouldn't be driving. And besides, I'm new to the company. I need all the friends I can get."

"What are you talking about?" Jeff demanded

"I'm not putting you down, it's just that you and Matt are the only people I've really bonded with since I've been here."

"Guess it's tough now that Matt and I are 'enemies', eh?" Jeff replied

"I know our fans aren't stupid, but since you two don't hang out a whole lot off-camera, I'm sortova loner. You get me?" Eric turned his head to face Jeff. "And I don't know why I'm telling you this, but I really prefer to be around a lot of people..."

"If you didn't, you wouldn't be in this profession." Jeff retorted

"I guess."

"We're here." Jeff pulled into the hotel lot and quickly found a spot near the doors.

Matt paced his hotel room, confused by recent things. He wished he hadn't told Jeff about his recent infatuation. It was hard enough trying to explain it to himself, but then Jeff goes and makes a fool of himself in front of the guy Matt was trying to impress. And now, he had a date with Eric.

"Dammit, Jeff, you've really done it this time." Matt threw himself at his bed and covered his face with the pillow.

Matt's phone rang. By the ringtone, he knew who it was and he didn't want to talk to him right now. He waited for the message.

"Hey, bro, it's me. Eric must've ate something bad so we're crashing in his room. We were gonna hang with you but I remembered how much you don't like being around sick people. I'll talk to you later. If I'm wrong about you and sick people, we're in room 1212."

Matt stared at the phone, wondering what to do. Should he go up and watch his brother make a fool of himself, all the while wanting to take Eric for himself? Or just spend another night alone, angry and confused?

"Have your fun, Jeff." He groaned "'Coz big brother isn't gonna take this lying down."

He tossed his phone away and stared at the ceiling. He could almost picture Jeff, literally throwing himself at Eric. Those eyes, that hair, God it was too much for him! That's why he'd suggested the TLC/tuxedo match. He'd needed an excuse, no matter how cheap, to get close to the man. And when Eric had agreed, he'd almost come in his pants right there.

Matt ran his hand down his chest, feeling the prick of stubble under his thin shirt. He always hated having to shave his chest almost every day, but he'd been cursed with dark hair. His fingers traced around his left nipple, tweaking it slightly and sending a wave of anticipation straight to his groin.

"Ah, yesss." Matt continued to play with his nipple with one hand while his other searched for the hardness between his legs. With a grunt, he forced open his pants and stared at his dick which had popped free of his jockey shorts.

He lightly touched himself, and his hand already felt sticky.

"Not gonna last too long tonight, eh Hardy?" Matt thought silently, starting to work his cock in his own special way. He knew he wasn't gonna last, so he became determined to make every second count. He could almost taste Eric on his lips, his mouth falling open slightly at the thought of the younger man kissing him, his tongue flicking out to wet them and moaning slightly.

"Oh... " Matt groaned "Yeah..." His mind played out his new favorite fantasy. Based on what he'd seen in the tuxedo match, he pictured playing with the soft fabric of the g-string. His fist pumping like a piston, he soon brought himself to the edge and then over it.

"Eric!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He screamed into his arm, hoping that he'd muffled his cry of ecstasy somewhat.

Down the hall, Eric was leaning over the toilet, having another case of the heaves when he heard something that sounded like his name. He wiped his mouth on a swatch of toilet paper and stepped out. Jeff was exactly where he had left him, sprawled one of the twin beds, demolishing a bag of Skittles.

"Did you hear that?" Eric asked

"Hear what?" Jeff replied, munching rather noisily.

"I thought I heard someone scream my name." Eric gingerly lay down on the other twin bed and exhaled loudly. "That's the last time we go to that club."

"At least to eat." Jeff added

"Yeah."

"Uh, Jeff, can we talk about something???"

"Sure, Eric, what's the deal?"

"I'm not sure how to bring this up, but are you expecting something from me other than friendship?" Eric looked over at Jeff, uncertainty plain on his face.

"What d'you mean?" Jeff looked back, slightly confused.

"I mean... how do I put this politely... do you want me in a sexual way?" Eric answered "I mean... oh fuck, I've blown our friendship, haven't I?"

The look Jeff returned made Eric feel ashamed.

"I've always lived honestly, Eric, and if you want to know the truth, I think we're destined for more than just being simple friends." Jeff answered

"Is that a yes?" Eric queried, confused. He hated it when people answered hs questions without actually answering them.

"Maybe." Jeff responded "I don't know what the future holds for us, and right now my motto is live for the moment, so I really don't care."

"Okay." Eric replied "Because I want to set the record straight... not the best choice of words, okay... but I do enjoy your company, but right now I'm not ready for more than that."

Jeff was disappointed, but he didn't let it show.

"And it has nothing to do with you being a guy, alright? Honestly, I don't know what you'd call me, but I believe that everyone has a soulmate, whatver gender mix it may be, and I don't think I've found him or her yet." Eric swung his feet over the bed and stared at Jeff. "I should probably go now."

"Yeah. You should." Jeff retorted

"I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings, but I thought you'd appreciate my honesty." Eric let himself out without another word.

Jeff rolled over and stared at the phone. He punched the top button on his speed dial.

After twelve rings, it was finally picked up.

"Matty...." was all Jeff said before he started to cry.


	2. Choosing Sides

Choosing Sides

Matt ran down the hallway. If there was one thing on this planet that really angered him, other than his best friend stealing his girl, it was somebody making his brother cry.

"Jeff?" He banged on the door. "C'mon Jeffro, it's me. Open up."

He heard footsteps on the other side, but the door remained closed.

"Jeff?" Matt cautiously tried the handle. It turned easily, so he opened the door and quickly peered inside. "You in here, bro?"

He heard something. Sounds of banging emitted from behind the bathroom door.

"It's me. Can I come in?" Matt rapped on the door with one knuckle. When he didn't hear a reply, he quietly turned the knob. Immediately, he saw his brother staring at the mirror. Matt knew that expression well. He'd spent many an hour doing the same, wondering what was wrong with himself shortly after losing Amy to Adam.

"Jeff?" It was almost a whisper.

Jeff turned his tear-streaked face to Matt.

"What happened? Where's Eric?"

"He doesn't love me..." Jeff sobbed

"What do you mean he doesn't love you?" Matt demanded "I thought..."

"I finally come out of my shell to approach him and he rejects me. Why? Is there something wrong with me?"

Matt had expressed the same sentiments years ago. He tried to remember what he'd been told back then.

"There's nothing wrong with you, baby brother." Matt stared at him, torn between his need to help and his own feelings toward Eric. "Maybe things weren't meant to be. Would you like me to talk to him?"

Jeff sniffled a yes.

"Just wait here. I'll take care of things."

Once he was in the hall, Matt let out a loud whoop. There was still a chance for him, but how could he get what he wanted without hurting Jeff even more than Eric already had?

"Forget it, Jeff. It's about time big brother did something for himself for once."

Eric paced his hotel room, trying to quash the irritation that was slowly building inside him, threatening to make him explode. Eric's problem wasn't that Jeff had a crush on him. He was used to guys, mostly gay though, telling him stuff like that. He'd never handled it right, not a once. Maybe he wasn't as sure about himself as he tried to portray. The more he thought about it, the less self-confident he became.

"Oh, to hell with it." Eric resolutely picked up the phone and was just about to call the operator when he was startled by several loud bangs on his door.

"Look, I..." Eric's voice died when he realized who he was talking to. He'd opened the door without thinking that it was gonna be anyone else. "You're not Jeff."

"Tell me something I don't know." Matt shouldered his way into the room.

"Is this a social call or are you here to bust my balls?" Eric demanded, closing the door behing Matt.

"Neither. I don't approve of what you did, but Jeff's old enough to handle rejection. At least he should be."

Eric looked confused. "Uh, Matt, in case you hadn't noticed, we're alone. You can drop the character."

"What character? It's about time I did something for me. I'm sick of always putting him first." Matt's eyes narrowed. "It's time to bring back some Mattitude."

"Whatever." Eric shrugged "But what's this got to do with me?"

"I tried with Shannon and it failed. I tried with Crash and it failed. I want to try again... I want you to be my next MF'er." Matt sprawled out on one of the beds.

"Me? An MF'er?" Eric laughed aloud. "Oh, that's rich. Dude, in case you hadn't noticed, there is only one person in the company more unlike you than me and he stands seven foot three."

"You're not that much different. Eric, I can make you into a champion." Matt used the same lines he'd used on both Shannon and Crash and hoped third time lucky.

"I am intrigued." Eric sat down on the bed opposite Matt. "But what about your brother? I kinda gathered the office wanted us to team up against you and Kozlov."

"Writers can be easily bought." Matt grinned

"Is there any special training required?" Eric grimaced at the thought of jumping off turnbuckles and twenty-foot ladders.

"No." Matt sighed "Just a lot of dick sucking."

Eric's grimace deepened. "Would you mind repeating that?"

"How do you think I convinced Shannon to stick around so long?" Matt stretched seductively, allowing his shirt to ride up enough so Eric could see how low his pants rode.

"So, basically, I suck you off and I'm in, is that it?" Eric stated

"You know what they say... to get ahead you have to give head." Matt reached for his belt.

"Just hold it right there, Hardy!" Eric leaped at the bed and pinned Matt's arms to his side, preventing his from doing anything else. "I don't know what you've heard, but I don't do things like that."

The fire in his eyes made Matt a little nervous. Not nervous enough to abandon his quest, though.

"I do them like this." Eric planted a hard kiss on the surprised elder Hardy boy. His raw emotion awoke something in Matt, something that Matt had not felt since his days with Amy. "Now, take your fuckin' clothes off!"

Matt had come into the room expecting to be the aggressor and now the roles were reversed. He hesitated; part of him wondering if this was a rib.

"Didn't you hear me?" Eric reached down and grabbed Matt's shirt in his hands and ripped it from his body, eerily reminiscent of the match they'd had only hours earlier.

"Ow!" Matt yelped

"Rule one... speak when spoken to!" Eric growled, twisting Matt's nipples for emphasis.

Matt cried out again.

"Rule two, the first and last words out of your mouth when you address me is 'sir'. Are you comprehending?"

Matt nodded.

"Wrong answer." Eric slapped him hard across the cheek. "Try again."

"Sir; yes sir." Matt answered, wondering what had gone wrong with his plan. He was supposed to be the man in charge, not submitting to Eric.

"Better. Now those clothes better be on the floor before I count to five or you'll get more of the back of my hand... one... two..."

Matt was out of his pants before Eric reached three. He lay back on the bed, anxiously awaiting what came next.

"You learn fast, slave. Keep it up and I may let you have some fun later on." Eric looked down at Matt's cock, and smiled.

"Not bad. Now can you do anything with it other than piss?" Eric flicked it with his finger. Matt moaned softly with the contact.

"Sir, yes I can, sir." Matt replied, seeing the stern look on Eric's face.

"Good. I'm glad to know there's a reason I'm keeping you around. Now get your clothes on and get out of my room. I'll call you when I need you."

"Sir, yessir." Matt scrambled into his pants and shoes and was out of Eric's room in no time flat.

"So far, so good." Eric quickly undressed and lay down. He was asleep in seconds.

When he arrived at the arena the following afternoon, Eric immediately sought out Matt. He wanted to find out if Matt was still deluded into thinking that he could manipulate Eric much the same way he'd manipulated both Shannon and Crash into blindly following him. To his surprise, and amusement, Matt had already gotten there, but was intentionally avoiding him.

"Absolutely perfect." Eric thought and started looking for his date from the night before.

"Anyone seen the Enigma?" He asked the locker room.

"Try the trainer's room." Someone suggested "I heard he was having problems with his knee."

Eric saluted. Putting on his most repentant look, he did find Jeff getting attention.

"Hiya."

Jeff looked up, his expression indicating that Eric was the last person he expected, and obviously wanted to talk to right then.

"I'd ask how your night went, but since I was there, I guess I don't need to."

"There you go, Jeff." The trainer finished taping the joint. "Just don't do any impressions of the Macho Man for the next couple days."

"What do you want?' Jeff asked

"Not a lot. Walk with me?" Eric asked, though it was more of a command.

"Sure." Jeff sighed, hopping of the table. The trainer gave them a funny look as they walked away.

Eric purposely took Jeff deep into the recesses of the arena. If Jeff reacted the way Eric expected he would, the fewer people around, the easier it was gonna be.

"This is hard for me, but I guess I should apologize for how last night ended." Looking around to make sure they were alone, Eric lit a cigarette. "Smoke?"

"Pass." Jeff replied, looking quizzically at Eric.

"Up 'til I got food poisoning, I was enjoying myself." Eric exhaled a huge cloud of smoke.

"Me too." Jeff replied

"Now that I'm not puking my guts every five seconds, maybe we can have a serious discussion..."

"'Bout what?"

"The two of us." Eric answered like it should be apparent. "Like where each of us see this relationship going? Because, honestly, I'm a little confused."

"Confused? What's there to be confused about?" Now it was Jeff's turn to put on the dumbfounded expression.

"How much do you really know about me?" Eric veered to the left.

"Enough to know I want more than a friendship."

Jeff's body language was plain. This was more than what Eric would have called an infatuation.

"The only reason I'm asking is... how do I explain this? I've never been with a guy, but I've never really been that comfortable with women either. I hope that makes sense?" Eric stubbed out the cigarette on his shoe.

"Yeah, man. It does." Jeff stated "That's kinda like me."

"Kinda?"

"I've said this before... as long I live my life being honest to myself, I don't really care what other people think."

"Interesting philosophy." Eric answered "So, I just don't want you to think that I'm saying no to you. I just need time to figure things out for myself. Cool?"

"Cool." Jeff smiled "You wanna do something later?"

"After tonight, I've got a couple days off. I was planning to go home and help out my mom. She's moving and I sorta got roped into some boxes for her."

"Oh." Jeff replied, crestfallen.

'I'm sure she could use all the help she could get." Eric smiled "If you're up to a day of manual labour."

"Yeah, count me in." Jeff answered

"Cool. Anyway, I gotta.... shit.... hide!" Eric pulled Jeff into a nearby storage closet. He'd heard footsteps.

"What?" Jeff was surprised at the sudden rough treatment.

"Shhh!" Eric indicated to Jeff to be quiet. He opened the door a crack and the two of them saw Matt and Shannon, standing in the same spot they'd just vacated.

"I don't know what to do." Matt was saying. "You remember when I made you my MF'er?"

"How could I forget?' Shannon replied "The training was, um... intense."

Jeff giggled. Eric glared at him.

"Yeah, well guess what? I got a new protege." Matt seemed happy. "I told my brother I'd help him out after his boy toy rejected him."

"Rejected? What the hell did you tell him?" Eric hissed

Jeff swallowed nervously.

"Eric's mine. And, guess what, he wants me as much as I want him."

Eric's eyes bulged and he mouthed something unrepeatable.

When Matt went into detail about what had happened in Eric's hotel room only hours ago, Eric had to forcibly stop himself from charging out of his concealment.

"I have never gotten off that fast in my life." Matt stated.

"So what's the plan?" Shannon asked

"I got both of them right where I want them. Now, all I have to do is make Jeff think that I'm still on his side." Matt laughed, Shannon also.

"It's a stroke of genius." Shannon said

"That's why I'm the brains of this operation and you're in charge of the grunt work." Matt stated "You know what you're supposed to do?"

"Keep Jeff occupied." Shannon replied

"Exactly. Now we'd better go back before people starting getting the wrong impression."

"Too late." Eric whispered

They waited several minutes before coming out of the closet. "Nice plan, Matt. But I'm not playing your game!" Eric clenched his fist and slammed it into his open palm.

"Eric..." Jeff asked in a small voice. "How could you?"

"Don't tell me you believed all that?" Though he tried to downplay it, Eric could tell from Jeff's face that he'd believed most of what Matt had said.

Jeff stared at the floor. His inability to make eye contact answered Eric.

"Honesty always works for me. Would you like to hear my side of the story?" Eric sighed "Matt did come to my room last night. And yes, he did try to recruit me to be his next MF'er, and yes, things happened, but Jeff, and this is the part I really need you to believe, there is nothing between Matt and me." Eric grabbed Jeff's shoulders and stared face to face.

"But the way he was talking..." Jeff was torn between his feelings for Eric and what he'd just heard from his brother.

"This is the guy who just cost you your title." Eric replied "He's hurt you once before. Why wouldn't he make something like this up? Don't read anything into this, but I'd rather be with someone who has a little more integrity than that." If looks could kill, Eric would be serving a life sentence.

"It's an overload, isn't it? Tell you what, after your match with Matt tonight, we'll confront him. I don't like where this is going and I'm not going to let him start spreading rumours about either of us." Eric suggested

"Sure." Jeff agreed

"You have nothing to worry about, Jeff. I am one hundred percent behind you."

From the locker room, Eric watched Jeff and Matt tear into each other. How Matt could think that he had any sort of feelings for him was inconceivable. As for reciprocation, if Eric was even remotely interested, there was no way he'd have pulled the drill instructor routine with Matt.

Suddenly, a wave of nausea came over him again. He bolted into the bathroom and blew chunks. After all the upchucking he'd done the previous night, Eric wondered how there could be anything left in his stomach to regurgitate.

"You okay?" Eric heard someone rap tentatively on the door of the stall.

"Yeah. Just a little case of food poisoning." Eric grimaced at the taste of bile.

"I heard."

Eric quickly wiped his face off and flushed.

"That's the last time I eat anything I don't cook myself."

"I guess you better learn how to cook, then." Adam joked

"I guess." Eric answered "How's the match goin'?"

"They're beating the tar out of each other."

"Enough of the North Carolina jokes." Eric groaned "It makes me wonder if you're aren't a closet Hardy."

Adam laughed loudly. "Who writes your material?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Eric knew forced laughter when he heard it, especially when it was as obvious as when Adam did it. "I think I'm gonna get some air before my match."

"You got time." Adam feigned looking at his watch. "I think."

"If I'm not back, stall for me."

Eric walked toward the exit, but once out of sight of everyone, took a sharp turn and headed for the Gorilla position.

Nobody said two words when he passed the curtains and headed down the ramp. The fans alerted the in-ring competitors to his presence, but neither Jeff nor Matt acknowledged Eric, both of them thinking the same thing.

Eric took a seat next to the timekeeper and watched the match intently, trying not to appear that he was on one side or the other.

When Jeff Swantoned on top of a prone Matt, it looked like a sure victory. Somehow, Matt kicked out at two and a half.

"C'mon, finish him!" Eric shouted

Both Matt and Jeff looked at him

. Both nodded. Immediately, both looked at each other suspiciously, then angrily, followed by a back and forth flurry of punches. Things got interesting when Jeff whipped Matt into the corner and the referee got sandwiched between them.

Like a shot, Eric was in the ring, chair in hand. Grabbing Jeff, he pushed him out of the way and lined Matt up with the chair.

"Remember, you're MY bitch, not the other way around."

Eric swung. To his astonishment, Matt blocked it and applied the Twist of Fate while Eric was momentarily off-balance. Jeff tried to submarine Matt while he seemed to be distracted, but he used Eric's chair to knock Jeff for a loop. The referee recovered just in time to see Matt cover Jeff. He counted the pin fall, much to the fans displeasure.

"Your winner and still ECW champion... Matt Hardy!"

Eric, still slightly dazed, got to his feet. He looked at Jeff, bloody on the mat, then back to Matt. Without removing his gaze from the still-champion, he helped Jeff to his feet. Then laughed maniacally, like he'd just heard the best joke on the planet and clotheslined the younger Hardy back down.

He looked back at Matt, who seemed to be just as confused as everyone else was.

"Get your ass over here, boy!" Eric ordered "Don't make me slap you around some more."

As Jeff lay semi-conscious on the mat, Eric stood over him. "This is me telling you I'm not interested!" He grabbed Matt by his long black hair and kissed him.

**TO BE CONTINUED**

_The Mattitude era has begun again! (V2.0) How will Jeff react? You'll have to read on to find out._


	3. Say What?

Since I haven't said it in a while, all characters are copyright WWE Inc... I'm just doing what I want with them!

Say What?

After betraying Jeff, the last things Eric wanted to do was hang around the locker room any more than he had to. Facing questions from the guys was bad enough, but having to deal with an hysterical Jeff was not something he was ready for. Yet. With a simple "I'll see you later" to Matt, he was out the door and driving back to his hotel room.

Driving back, the music blaring, he noticed a car tailgating him.

"Must be in a rush." He thought, and slid over to the far lane. The car followed, maintaining the same speed and distance.

"What the..." Eric looked in the rear-view mirror, hoping to maybe get a look at the driver.

Eric sped up. So did the person following him. Eric tried every trick he knew: changing lanes, speeds, cutting in and out of traffic every chance he got, but he couldn't shake him.

"Someone must really want my fucking autograph." Eric pulled over to the shoulder and turned off the car. The red corvette pulled in behind him and stopped, but the driver didn't get out.

Eric waited, drumming on the steering wheel. Eventually, curiosity got the best of him and he stepped out. Knowing that he was a dead man if his pursuer was armed, he lit a cigarette. He'd always thought that his last request would be a smoke. Hopefully it wouldn't come true on a stretch of highway east of Des Moines.

When whoever it was refused to show himself, or herself, Eric, already feeling like he was on the Green Mile, walked toward the car.

"Whoever you are, this stopped being funny a long time ago." He yelled

The window tint made it impossible to see who it was until he was right beside the car.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Eric demanded "I left you lying in the ring."

"You didn't get the job done." Jeff opened the door, catching Eric by surprise. The door slammed into his shins, knocking him onto his butt.

"Yeah. My weakness." Eric answered, scrambling to his feet. Having a pissed-off Jeff Hardy tower over him was not a position he wanted to be in."So I suspect you want answers?"

"Would be nice." Jeff leaned back and crossed his arms.

"Since when do I have to explain anything to anybody, especially you? I have my reasons. Let's leave it at that." Eric turned back to his car.

Jeff swung Eric around. "What'd I do wrong?" His voice quavered. "At least tell me that! I thought we were..."

Eric struggled to find the words he needed. "I thought I knew what I wanted, but we're just too different. I need someone a lot more grounded. You're just too high-strung."

"But Matt? Of all the people on the planet, you took my own brother!"

Eric sighed. He expected this kind of reaction from Jeff, but had hoped to have a little more time to come up with a believable explanation.

"Look, let me say it again... I have my reasons! Right now, it doesn't concern you..."

"The fuck it doesn't..." Jeff punched Eric.

"Whatever. If you aren't willing to accept it, I'm not going to try to convince you, and neither am I going to stand here and get into it with you." Eric drove off, leaving Jeff to figure it out for himself.

"Matt. My hotel room. Twenty minutes." Eric barked over his phone.

"Sir, yes sir." Matt answered

Eric smiled. "Good boy. We have things to plan."

Pacing his hotel room in anticipation, Eric plotted. The plan had worked so far, but Jeff's tailing of Eric had caused him to panic and reveal things he hadn't wanted to. Twenty-three minutes later, Matt finally banged on his door.

"You're late!" Eric yelled

"Sir, sorry, sir!" Matt replied

"I'll let it slide this time, but next time I'm gonna tear a strip off ya." His encounter with Jeff gotten to him more than he wanted to admit to, but he had to maintain control. "Sit."

"Why didn't you tell me that Jeff was coming after me?"

Matt's expression showed that the news surprised him. "I didn't know." He responded "He took off right after the match..."

"You could've at least called me and told me that. I'm driving along, thinking I've got some psychotic fan chasing after me." Eric rubbed his jaw where Jeff had hit him. "If I'd known who it was, I wouldn't have bothered stopping. Anyway... where do we go from here?"

"Sir..."

"Why don't we drop this master and servant kick until the cameras are rolling?"

Matt nodded.

"So, tell me what Jeff is likely to do? You know him a lot better than I do." Eric walked the small room back and forth, feeling conflicted by the recent events.

"Jeff will do one of two things... sir? He'll either go into spaced-out mode or he'll do the opposite."

"After what happened earlier, I think I'd prefer spaced out." Eric replied ruefully "He packs quite a punch."

Matt nodded in agreement.

"I hope he gets over me soon. I really don't like being the meat in a Hardy sandwich." Eric sniggered at the visual.

"Wouldn't be the first time." Matt replied

"Say what?"

"Lita." He replied "There was one night a few years ago..."

"And?"

"Let's say that I found out that little brother isn't so little after all." Matt joked

"You didn't...!!!"

"Fuck no, I got the one end, Jeff got the other."

"Interesting visual." Eric smiled. "Jeff must be impressive, considering what I've seen of you."

"You wanna see more?" Matt gave his crotch a squeeze.

"Later." Eric replied "I've got some other stuff to deal with."

"Cool."

"Yeah... like I told a certain ex-suitor, I believe that everyone has a soul mate..."

_Four weeks later..._

Eric and Matt arrived at the arena together, like they had every chance they got. On-screen, they were inseparable, and off-screen they spent a lot of time together as well. Thanks to a rigged drug test, Jeff had been given a sixty-day suspension, but that had been reversed when his second test came back negative.

"Chill. He's back tonight." Tazz warned them.

"It's not that hard to avoid him." Matt retorted

"Especially with that colour hair." Eric added

Matt and Eric laughed.

"Shh... here he comes!" Matt whispered

Matt and Eric tried to keep even looks when Jeff walked by.

"Enjoy your time off?" Eric couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"Fuck you." Jeff's reply lacked it's usual force.

"No thanks. I'm with a real man now." Eric patted Matt's neck. "Right, Matty?"

Jeff's eyes bulged when he heard Eric address Matt that way. He looked like he wanted to say something, then ran toward the locker rooms.

"I think little Jeffy doesn't like us." Matt sang.

"He'll get over it. Do you have any idea what we're doing tonight?" At a much slower pace, they also headed for the locker room area.

"The same thing we've been doing?"

"I guess. Creative hasn't been exactly on the ball lately." Eric was referring to the writers' recent habit of building up story lines, but then resolving them very cheaply with either a title change or an alliance switch or something totally expected.

"Time to get into character. Remember, two steps behind." Eric wiped any trace of humanity from his face.

"Sir, yes sir." Matt stepped back, grabbing the handle of Eric's kit. Since Eric's heel turn, Matt had become less and less his own person and, at least on air, was only trying to please Eric. For what reason had not been revealed officially, but it seemed that as long as he did what Eric said, Matt hung on to his ECW title.

Eric strutted into the room and took his customary position in the far corner. Matt waited patiently while he changed.

"Have you taken care of everything I asked you to?" He barked

"Sir, yes sir."

"Car washed?"

"Sir, yes sir."

"Good. Now don't screw up the match tonight or you will be punished." Eric demanded "Now get outta my face until I need you." Eric leaned back and closed his eyes.

"Sir, yes sir." Matt saluted and left.

"Good help is so hard to find." Eric muttered

"Can I ask you something?" The other Striker, Matt, queried from across the room.

"Go ahead."

"What are you trying to prove with Matt? Aren't you afraid that some time he'll just snap?"

"Not really. Matt has this thing for me. As long as I can keep him thinking that I'm interested in him, he'll do pretty much anything I ask. Plus, I'm the only reason he's still got that title around his waist." Eric opened his one eye to look at his interlocutor.

"But what if he finds out?"

"Then I've got both Hardy Boyz pissed off at me, I guess." Eric replied "Nothing new there."

"It's all too confusing for me." Striker answered "But you seem to know what you are doing."

"And if I don't, Creative does." Eric laughed, momentarily falling out of character.

"Sometimes." Matt laughed

"...uh, excuse me, Eric? Can you come here for a second?"

"Now what? Can't you see I'm busy?"

"We've got a problem in the ring."

"In the ring... I didn't know we'd even started!" Eric stood.

"Five minutes ago. C'mere."

Eric affected his most rigid stare and followed the unnamed serf into the hall. "What is so important that you had to interrupt me?"

"You might want to take a look at this."

What Eric was looking at was Jeff Hardy, giving one of the most br-u-u-tal promos he's heard in a while.

"...I poured my heart out to you, Eric and you tore it from me. As if that's not bad enough, you won't tell even tell me why you're screwing Matt! That's right, I said screwing..."

"Where the hell does he get off doing that?" Eric demanded

"I dunno, but that's not what was in the script."

"Find Matt and tell him to get his ass to the ring as soon as possible. I'm gonna take care of the first part then leave what's leave of him to Matt to deal with." Eric stalked out to the ring, no entrance music, no build-up, nothing. As the PA has said, this was not in the script, at least not the content of the promo, so the crew was winging it.

"Alright, that's about enough of that!" Eric shouted loud enough to be heard over the crowd, even without a mic. To be safe, he grabbed one on his way up the stairs though.

"Just what the hell are you doing?" Eric tried to control the fire that was building once more inside him.

"Exactly what you did to me." Jeff shouted "How does it feel to be publicly humiliated?"

"You call this humiliated? Hardy, you ain't seen nothing yet." Eric sneered "You want humiliation, I'll show you. Folks, here's whats really been going on. Jeffrey here has had a thing for me since the day I walked into the company. I can't even take a shower without being followed."

Jeff paled.

"Just to get him off my back, I agree to go to a club with him, and what does the guy do... he puts something in my food!"

Jeff started to protest, but Eric interrupted him.

"Like your brother, you'll speak when I tell you to!" Eric spat.

The crowd booed loudly.

"And that goes for all of you morons as well." This amplified the yells and catcalls. Eric didn't seem to care. His ego liked the attention to begin with.

"I tried letting you down easily, but since you can't seem to take a hint, let me speak frankly. You are nothing to me. You never were and you never will be. I have everything I need with Matt. Unlike you, he's a champion! You are a loser."

Matt's entrance theme cut in.

"It's about time you showed up. Cut that crap!" Eric yelled

Matt's music ended, mid-beat.

"You sent for me, sir?" Matt asked, affecting his most subservient tone.

"Yes, I did. Next time you better make it double-time! It's not my job to stand here in the middle of this backwater town and explain my actions to anyone, much less this inbred sibling of yours."

"Sir, yes sir." Matt answered

"Good boy. Now go back there and get me a referee. Since Jeff seems to be itchin' for a fight, I'm gonna give him one. Now!"

Matt jumped from the ring, and ran to the back.

"Since I don't count on Matt to be able to do such a simple task anytime soon, let me spell it out for you. If, via some fluke, you can beat me,you'll get a title shot at Matt next week. If that doesn't give you a set, nothing will." The thought of losing to Jeff made Eric laugh.

"What if I lose?" Jeff demanded

"You mean when you lose? I'll find something suitable for you." Eric laughed again. "You see what I mean? Matt, what the hell is taking you so friggin' long?"

Eric tapped his foot impatiently. "I really don't need a referee to take care of you."

"Why don't you put your money where your big mouth is then?" Jeff dared him.

"You got it." Eric slugged Jeff with the microphone. Eric pounced, repaying Jeff for his earlier punch with several of his own. The fan cheering caused him to look up and, what do you know, Matt had found a referee.

In the time it took to get into position, Eric had already made Jeff bleed.

"So nice of you to join us!" Eric mocked

"Just get on with it." Scott Armstrong pointed at Eric. "And no bullshit or I will disqualify you in seconds."

"More like this match will only take seconds." Eric continued the beat down.

Eric pummelled the bloody form of Jeff Hardy for a good five minutes with little or no offense from his opponent.

"This is boring." Eric shouted to no one in particular. "Hey, Matt, get up here!"

"Sir, yes sir." Matt climbed the apron. Eric held Jeff's arms and stuck him in Matt's face.

"My hands are sore. Knock him out."

"Sir, yes sir!" Matt replied enthusiastically. He reached into his trunks and took a set of brass knuckles.

Matt swung. Somehow, Jeff saw it coming and moved out of the way. Eric took the full force of the punch and fell down, his forehead already turning red. Jeff kicked Matt from the apron and covered Eric.

"One... two... three!"

The referee raised Jeff's hand in victory. They both left the ring when Eric sat up, groggily.

"What the hell just happened?" Eric looked around, feeling his forehead. The realization struck him and he screamed.

"HARDY! Get your ass in here, now!"

Matt climbed back into the ring, staring at the canvas as he prepared himself for the verbal whipping that was to follow.

"Can't you do anything right?" Eric asked

The calmness in his voice made Matt even more nervous than if he'd just come out and started ripping on him.

"Sir, I'm sorry,sir."

"Not half as sorry as you're gonna be." Eric snickered

"Sir, I don't understand, sir!"

"You will later... just move!" Eric jumped out of the ring and motioned for Matt to follow. "Get your ass back to the locker room and wait for me. I have to make a phone call."

Matt nodded sharply and went one way, Eric the other.

In the deep recesses of the arena, the kind of place where you would expect to find Mankind hanging out, Eric finally felt that he was safe enough to make this particular call.

"Small setback. But don't worry, I've got everything under control. That Hardy Boy won't know what hit him until it's too late. And even then, he probably won't understand."

**TO BE CONTINUED**

_Like sands through the hourglass, so are the Days of our Lives... I figured since this is starting to feel like a soap opera, I might as well end it like one. A little word of caution... things will get more confusing before they resolve. I'd tell you more, but that would give away the ending!  
_


	4. Now, Where Were We?

Now Where Were We?

"Ow!" Eric grimaced. "Give me that!"

He grabbed the bag of ice from Matt and placed it gently across his forehead.

"Sorry." Matt mumbled

"I'll say. What the hell were you thinking? Can't you even use a set of knucks properly? God, if you had half a clue, you'd be dangerous!"

"Sorry." Matt apologized yet again.

"I'm sure you are. Sometime I wonder what I was thinking." Eric had gone to the trainers' room after making his phone call, searching for some ice for his head. "You fuck up like that again and you can kiss your ECW title goodbye, you do realize that?"

"Sir, yes sir." Inadvertantly, Matt snapped back into his on-camera persona.

"And what did I tell you about that shit?" Eric shook his head.

"Sorry."

"And stop apologizing!" Eric shouted "Just leave me alone!" He lay back on the table, covering his entire face with the ice pack.

"But..."

Eric motioned for him to leave. Downfallen, Matt acquiesced. In truth, the bravado he had displayed only a few weeks earlier was leaving him faster than a post-coital erection.

"You got any more ice?" Eric asked the trainer.

"Yeah. Let me refill it."

"You heard everything, didn't you?"

"Enough, but I've learned not to get involved in story lines."

"But what if this isn't a story line?" Eric asked

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know how to explain this." Eric replied, gladly accepting the refilled bag. His temple was already swollen and several nice shades of purple. "I'm stuck in the middle of something and I can't see a way out."

"This doesn't by any chance have something to do with the affections of certain former members of a high-flying tag team, does it?"

"It's that obvious?" Eric said, dumbfounded.

"Well, from my experience, when people usually try to conceal their true feelings for someone, they try to do it in one of two ways: either by treating them like crap and hoping they will forget all about them or by deceit."

"Well, let's see. By that logic, I'm treating Matt like crap and I've screwed Jeff over. Where does that leave me?" Eric sat up, the pain in his head numbed significantly.

"Like you said, you're stuck in the middle. I'm no shrink, but maybe you should decide who you want to be with."

"And what if I don't know?" Eric asked

"That is beyond my experience. I'm just the trainer. And one last word of advice: I have a certain client coming by shortly to have his knee re-taped. You might want to be somewhere else by then."

Eric understood. "Thanks for your help, though."

"Any time."

"Just send me the bill." Eric laughed, though he found the humour in the situation lacking.

"First consultation's free." The trained grabbed a roll of athletic tape from his box and starting cutting it into smaller strips. Eric took the cue.

For all his advice, the trainer had left Eric with more questions than answers. The longer this went on, the more indecisive Eric became.

"One week." He thought "Then this will all be over."

"Then what will be over?"

Eric realized he'd just made two huge mistakes. The first was talking out loud and the second was not making sure that he was alone when he did it.

"What the hell do you want?" he demanded

"It's a free country and I've got an appointment with the trainer."

"He's waiting for you." Eric gestured at the door.

Jeff looked around, to ensure they were alone before continuing. "He can wait... how are you doing?"

The question surprised Eric. Since he turned, Jeff hadn't spoken two words to him.

"As well as can be expected." He replied "I wake up every morning wondering what the hell I'm doing and go to sleep asking the same question."

"Me too." Jeff agreed

"Eventually, Matt is gonna come around... isn't he?" Eric posed

"I hope so." Jeff replied "If he doesn't, we're both fucked."

"Literally and figuratively... oh crap!"

Wonder of wonders, if Matt wasn't walking down the corridor, heading right for them.

"Just play along, Jeff." Eric whispered

"Yeah, Dad, I know but... can I call you back?" Matt had just seen them. Jeff and Eric tried to make it seem like a chance encounter.

"Hiya, bro."

"What's going on?"

"Since when is what I do any of your business?" Eric bellowed "I thought I told you to go away!"

"I just talked to the boss. He wants to see you in his office." Matt replied

"At least you can deliver messages. Anything else?"

"No, sir." Matt replied. Jeff stifled a giggle.

"Then I will see you later." Eric strode back the way Matt had come.

"What are you doing?" Matt waited until Eric was out of earshot before going nose to nose with Jeff. "He's mine."

"Yeah, whatever." Jeff replied "The only reason you want him is to hurt me more. You cost me my title, and now you're taking the one guy I want. Well, Matt, once I am done with you, I'm gonna get what I want..."

"That's always been the trouble... it's always been about you! You're the one everyone cares about... not me!"

"That's not true..." Jeff protested

"Your house burns down and what happens... millions of fans send you stuff. I get fucked over by my best friend, and released within a couple days and does anyone even care? Not even a fuckin' FTD floral bouquet." Matt growled "It's about time I did something for me!"

"Matt, I..."

"Don't start... even our own father is against me. I just talked to him and do you know what he had the nerves to say... "Matt, why are you hurting your little brother like this?"

"Matt, deal with it. If life give you bullshit, plant a garden with it." Jeff answered

"Oh, I'm gonna deal with it. And when I'm done dealing with it, you'll see why I'm the king of Mattitude."

"Yeah, whatever. I'm late as it is..." Jeff smirked, flicking several strands of red, blue, and purple hair out of his eyes,

"Make sure the trainer does a good job. I don't want to hear any excuses as to why you lost..." Matt sneered

"I'm not gonna lose." Jeff responded "I beat Eric..."

"Fluke."

"...and I'm gonna beat you as well. Good luck, brother, you'll need a lot more than Mattitude to keep that title."

"Mr. Mcmahon, you wanted to see me?"

"Yes, Eric, please have a seat."

Looking around the room, Eric noticed that they were not alone. Also at this meeting was CEO Linda McMahon as well as several suits. Corporate lawyers, Eric assumed.

"Is there a problem?"

"Eric, I'm going to be direct... WWE is losing money hand over fist right now. With the stock markets going the way we are, we've had to streamline our business. You've probably heard about the massive cutbacks we're instituting." Vince stared across the desk at Eric.

"Who hasn't?" There were a few faces, mostly office staff, that Eric hadn't seen around in a while. Layoffs, he'd assumed.

"Unfortunately, we're gonna have to trim our roster as well. We didn't want to have to go this far, but until we start making money again, we just can't afford to have the payroll we currently do."

"I'm being fired? I've only been here a few months!"

"Don't think of it as being fired. We're gonna buy out your contract." It was Linda's turn to speak. "Now, we're not gonna pay you the entire amount owing, but you'll be free to pursue other options..."

"Great! I just bought a fuckin' house..." Eric thought "When do I leave?"

"Next week." Vince stated "After the Matt and Jeff title match, you'll just disappear."

"That makes no sense!" Eric shouted

"Talk to Creative. They've come up with several options. It's ultimately up to you, but this is, in effect, your swan song." Vince gestured to one of the lawyers, who took a sheet of paper from his briefcase and slid it across the table.

"This is your release. Read it and have it back to me by the close of business today."

Quickly skimming it, Eric breathed a sign of relief. The payout would cover his bills for at least six months. He was expecting a gold watch and a boot.

"If things change, we will let you know." Linda tried to soften the blow. "And don't read anything into this. You've been a very hard worker for us. The boys in the back like you. It's just business."

"Yeah. As my Dad used to say... shit happens!" Eric signed the buyout. "I know it's business, and frankly, don't take this the wrong way, but I won't be coming back."

Eric left. If the buyout hadn't stipulated that he had to make all his contractual obligations until his last day, Eric would've walked right then.

"Oh well, time to put on a brave face for the boys." Eric went to find the writers... maybe he could go out with a bang rather than a whimper.

"This contest is being fought under extreme rules and it is for the ECW heavyweight championship!"

"You ready to show that brother of mine that his luck has finally run out?" Matt bounced around, psyching himself up pre-match.

"Yeah." It was Eric's last night, yet he looked forward to it. It could have had something to do with having closure, or maybe the fact that no one outside the people at the meeting and Creative knew that he was done after tonight. Matt had asked him about the meeting, but Eric had lied about the reason for it. "I promise you that the same thing will not happen tonight... or your ass will belong to me!"

Kane happened to pass by, and overhearing the last part of Eric's statement, chuckled.

"What are you staring at, you big red retard?" Eric shouted

"What did you say?" Kane growled

"Clean the wax out of your ears, dummy." Eric refused to back down.

"Eric, what are you doing?" Matt grabbed Eric's arm.

"I'm sick of everybody thinking weird things about me!" Eric replied, without removing his gaze from the almost seven-footer. "It's all part of the show, for God's sake! Do you honestly think I want Matt that way? There's no way I could be any straighter than I am and still be able to bend!"

"Eric, c'mon, we have a match..." Matt's theme had just begun.

"You have a match... win it!"

Matt shrugged.

Eric watched him step out onto the stage, then returned his look to Kane. "Good job. Sorry about the retard crack, but I forgot what I was supposed to say."

"Don't worry. I'll make up for it later."

"Let them go at it for ten or so, then we start?" Eric asked

:"I dunno. How long is their match?"

"I heard they have twenty." Eric replied "But we can always shorten that if we have to."

"Just tell me what you want me to do."

"Nothing special... choke slam... tombstone... set me on fire... whatever you like." Eric answered "Let's give everyone something to remember."

"No time like the present, then." Kane grabbed Eric by the hair and flung him into a wall. Eric felt his forehead split upon impact.

"And away we go."

Matt and Jeff were going at in in a particularly brutal match. The real heat between them made for a more aggressive style of wrestling out of both men. The extreme rules stipulation did nothing to stop them, either.

Maybe eight minutes into the title match, the attention of the entire crowd was drawn from the ring when an incredible bang came from the stage. Even Matt and Jeff paused.

Eric, or should I say what was left of him, was being tossed around like a sick person's cookies. His face was a crimson mask, his new "very proper" suit was in tatters, and he swung like a drunk man when he tried to hit Kane.

Matt, afraid that his one chance of retaining his title was going down, quickly stunned Jeff with a trash can lid and then chased after Kane. Holding Eric by the throat, Kane held him at bay.

"Back off!" Kane bellowed "Or he dies!"

"You see, Matt. You're not the only one who can play dirty." Matt turned at the sound of his brother's voice. Jeff was upright in the center of the ring, and looked remarkably pleased with what was going on. "You have two choices... you can either get back in here and job for me or two, Kane will choke slam your boy right to hell!"

"Jeff, don't do this!" Matt pleaded "Tell Kane to stop!"

"How does it feel, not being in charge for once big brother?" Jeff spat "This time I hold all the cards."

"Not all of them... you're in love with Eric a lot more than I am." Matt replied "You're the one who called me, crying, when he told you that he couldn't give you what you wanted. Go ahead, Kane, I'm calling your bluff, Jeff."

"Matty, you should at least know this about me. I don't bluff, Kane... get him." Jeff yelled

Kane went into one of his rages, lifting the rag doll form over his head and preparing to toss him off the stage.

"Last chance, Matt." Jeff smiled "Just give me the title and it'll all end."

Matt looked at Kane, still clutching Eric high in the air, then back to his brother who seemed to be enjoying his moment.

"I guess you've made up your mind, bro." Jeff watched Matt struggle with a decision. "Kane..."

"Wait!" Matt pleaded "If I give you the title, you'll let him go?"

"I promise you Kane will let him go once I have the belt." Jeff replied

"Fine." Matt lay down and waited. Jeff covered his brother and the referee made the unnecessary three count.

"The winner and new ECW champion... Jeff Hardy!" The announcement was also unnecessary.

Matt quickly jumped to his feet. Kane still held Eric by the throat.

"Jeff, you promised."

"Yes, I did. Kane, let him go."

Kane grinned evilly. To Matt's horror, Kane choke slammed Eric off the riser and onto a pile of electrical equipment. Sparks flew and Eric convulsed wildly.

"Eric!" Matt yelled

** TO BE CONTINUED**

_Now that the confusion is at it's Zenith, time to step back a bit with some hot and heavy sex! Things will start to make sense soon! _

_P.S. This is the last time I let Raw vs Smackdown dictate plot lines for me.  
_


	5. The End of the Innocene

The End of the Innocence

Both Matt and Jeff watched while Eric was attended to by the EMTs.

"That wasn't supposed to happen!" Matt whispered

"I know." Jeff replied "Kane went too far."

"Yeah, he did... wait a minute... how would you know?" Matt inquired, his suspicions starting to arouse.

"Uh..." Jeff stuttered

"I thought so." Matt interrupted "I'm gonna find Glenn. I want some answers!"

"So do I." Jeff added

The two Hardys ran backstage. There was no sign or either Eric or the people who'd been working on him.

"You find Glenn. I'm gonna check something." Jeff ran to the parking lot. He found what he was looking for and ran back to where his big brother was still hunting that most elusive of critters: the Big Red Machine.

"We've been had, bro." Jeff announced "Eric's car is gone."

"For a big man, Kane can sure make himself scarce." Matt flicked his hair out of his face. "What did you think was supposed to happen out there?"

"Honestly Matty, it was all Eric's idea. The whole thing: the rejection, picking you over me... all of it. It was just to get back at you for screwing me at the Rumble." Jeff replied

"And Kane...?"

"All he was supposed to do was threaten to take Eric out if you didn't lay down for me. Nowhere was a choke slam into an electrical setup discussed." Jeff answered

"He's got some explaining to do, that's for sure." Matt stated

They searched the arena high and low and couldn't find a trace of him. Not even Mark had seen him, but his stuff was also conveniently missing from his locker.

"Dude, I think we've been had." Jeff said the obvious.

----

"I wonder if they've figured it out yet?" Eric laughed, driving along at his usual breakneck speed.

"If not, they're probably looking for me." Eric's passenger looked over.

"I gotta give it to you, man. After what you did to me, no one is ever gonna expect to see me again." Eric laughed a second time.

"You might wanna slow down. If we get pulled over, it might be hard to explain your face..."

"...and our clothes." Eric gestured "Well, you they might recognize."

"Yeah. The clothes I can fix, though." Kane reached down, unsnapping his boots. "Just keep your eyes on the road."

"Afraid I'm gonna find out the Big Red Machine ain't so big after all?" Eric laughed yet again.

"More like you're gonna hit something." Kane retorted "And you've seen it before, so what's the problem?"

"Actually, I haven't." Eric said "But don't think I'm asking..."

"Whatever." Kane sighed, tossing his boots into the back seat.

Eric tried to keep his focus on the driving, but when he caught a shot of something that looked like a mature anaconda hanging between Kane's legs, he almost lost control of the car.

"Impressive, eh?" Kane flopped it around a few times before putting his pants on.

"I'm surprised you haven't put someone's eye out with that." Eric whistled "How do the girls take it?"

Now it was Kane's turn to laugh. "Actually, there's been only one person who's been able to handle me."

"Your wife, I'd assume?"

"I wish." Kane put on his shirt. "If she could, I wouldn't have gone elsewhere."

"Well...?" Eric asked when Kane didn't elaborate.

"Well what?"

"Are you gonna tell me or do I have to guess?"

"Phil." Kane replied

"Punk?" Eric gasped "You're kidding me!"

"I... don't... kid!" Kane exhaled, momentarily going back into character.

"Relax... It's just that I thought... I guess "straight edge" deosn't necessarily mean straight." Eric sniggered at his own joke. "Anyway, we're pulling over for a second. I'm gonna jump in the back and change while you drive."

"Where we goin' anyway?"

"Anywhere... I'm thinking that it's a good idea to put some mileage between the two of us and Matt and Jeff."

"We're only a coupla hours from my place." Kane said "You can chill there for a bit."

"Won't your wife mind?"

"She's outta town for a week. Honestly? I could use the company. The house gets kinda lonely."

"Yeah. We're around thousands of people all the time. I guess it could." Eric pulled into a parking lot, and they changed positions. In seconds, the car was back on the road.

---

"That son of a bitch!" Matt shouted

"What?" Jeff asked

"Why didn't he tell me?"

"Matt, what is it?" Jeff repeated

"I just talked to Vince. Tonight was his last night." Matt exploded

"Slow down, bro. You've lost me." Jeff replied

"Eric; they released him. Tonight was his farewell." Matt sat down on a crate.

"Why the hell didn't he tell us?" Jeff demanded

"I just asked that." The elder Hardy groaned

"You got his cell number?"

"No! I thought you had it." Matt looked up.

"ME? You were the one fucking him!" Jeff retorted

"Yeah, right." Matt answered "I showed him my dick and that was it."

"Further than I got." Jeff replied wistfully.

"I'll go talk to the office again. I'm sure they have a number for him." Matt hopped off the box.

---

Eric's Viper, with Kane driving, pulled up to a house in a gated community that was worth at least ten times what Eric earned as a pro wrestler.

"Nice. You sure the wife won't mind?"

"Hell, no. Mark stays here all the time." Kane replied "Look, if you're afraid I'm gonna try something, nothing is gonna happen unless you want it to. Unlike Matt and Jeff, I don't trawl off the company dock."

"That didn't stop you and Phil." Eric thought "And I don't work for the company any more, either."

His cell phone rang while he was following Kane into the house.

"I guess they figured it out." Eric said, once he'd waited for the phone to stop.

"Huh?"

"That was Matt's ring tone. Now, if the boy had been really smart, he would've called from either a pay phone or Vince's private line." Eric smiled "Sometimes it's just too easy."

"I could've told you that." Kane joked

"Well, you just did." Eric followed him inside. "Wow!"

"Not what you expected?"

"Not from someone who sets people on fire." Eric looked around, admiring everything. "Just don't tell me that you did all the decoration."

Kane shrugged. "Okay. Wanna drink."

"Sure." Eric replied "Just remember, I gotta drive home later."

While Eric and Kane were settling into the den with a couple of cold beers, Matt and Jeff were still at the arena, working on a plan of their own.

"Eric's not answering his phone." Matt said, disgusted. "I just get his voice mail."

"We could always wait for him at his place. He's got to go home sometime." Jeff suggested

"That's eight hours away by car." Matt protested "And try getting a flight at this short notice... and we have a house show tomorrow night."

"Well, if it weren't for that, we could do it, right?"

Matt shook his head. Sometimes Jeff could be so innocent.

"You know, Jeffro, sometimes I wonder about you..." he said

"Maybe this was all part of Eric's plan." Jeff looked pensive.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, we're talking to each other again." Jeff replied

"Now you've lost me." Matt wondered where Jeff was heading.

"Didn't you notice it? Ever since the Rumble, there's been static between us." Jeff explained

"I thought that was part of the story. You know, keepin' it real and all that." Matt responded

"So did I... to a point. But this time it felt different. Like you really hated me."

Matt thought about it for a second and realized that his brother was right. In previous battles, it had been easy to turn off the anger once the show was over, but this time, come to think of it, it did feel different.

"Jeff, you know I could never hate you." Matt soothed both his and Jeff's nerves. "Maybe my lust overpowered my common sense?"

"That wouldn't be the first time that's happened." Jeff smirked

"I'll get you for that." Matt sulked

"Later, bro, let's find Eric and thank him the way only the Hardy's can." Jeff winked

Matt followed his brother out of the arena, wondering exactly what he meant. He had an idea, not that anything Jeff came up with was bound to be that normal.

"If someone had told me than in the span of a day, I'd be getting drunk with a guy who had just choke slammed me through electrical equipment, I'd have told them where to go." Eric polished off the bottle. "But I can't think of someone I'd rather be drinking with right now."

"Not even the Hardys?" Kane asked, chugging the rest of his beer down.

"Too much drama with them." Eric replied "And speaking of going, I should be."

"You've had too much to drink, Eric. You're not going anywhere." Kane ordered

"I have not... I've only had... let's see..." Eric looked at the tabletop, now covered with brown bottles. "that many."

"You're staying here." Kane repeated "Gimme your keys."

"I've drunk more than that and driven home." Eric answered "I'm fine."

"Oh really? Home is a six hour drive from here. You think you can get there without blacking out?"

"I do."

"If something happens to you, it's my ass in the fire." Kane added "I'm not letting you out of here until you sober up. The couch is yours and I'm not taking no for an answer."

"You just want to have your wicked way with me. Well, I don't do things that way." Eric shouted, standing up and immediately falling down.

Kane quickly crossed the room and helped Eric to his feet. Eric stood shakily for a second, then lost his footing again, falling against the big man's frame.

"See. I told you I was fine." He laughed

"Bullshit. Either stay here or I'm calling Matt and Jeff and telling them where you are." Kane responded

"You wouldn't?"

"Wouldn't I?" Honestly, Kane hoped Eric wouldn't call him on it. Unless he got his phone, he had no way of contacting them. Hopefully, Eric didn't know this.

"Fine. I'll stay the night." Eric gritted his teeth. He'd hoped to be well on his way home by morning.

"Good boy." Kane patted him on the head.

"One one condition, or I'm gone." Eric figured the only way out of here was to suggest something he knew Kane wouldn't go for. "You let me suck your dick."

Kane was taken aback. It had been awhile since he'd had anything, but he still hesitated.

"I'll pretend that was the liquor talking." Kane growled "Good night."

"I'm outta here." Eric staggered to the door.

Kane exhaled loudly. "Fine." He said "But you tell anyone and I will make you pay."

"Like who? Your wife? I'll be gone by the morning... the guys??? I don't work for Vince any more." Eric smarted off. "Now whip that snake out and let me see if I can make Phil look like an amateur."

Kane sighed, unzipping his fly and pulling his dick out. Eric looked at it enviously. "Is it a requirement that all WWE superstars have big dicks? You make Matt look tiny."

Kane smiled. He'd seen what Matt carried around and that was a compliment.

Eric took the monster's monster dick and stroked it a few times to get the feel of it. "You say Phil took it all?"

"Almost." Kane was looking down, wondering if this was actually gonna happen.

"Well, here goes nothing." Eric swiped across the head with his tongue a few times, then down to the base, making Kane groan. Steadying himself, he took all of Kane in one gulp, fighting back the urge to gag, and slowly working his way back up.

"There. Next time you see Phil, you can tell him there's a new king in town." Eric looked at Kane again, like "What the hell?" and went back down on him. Up and down he went, taking all of Kane each time. It was Kane who had to steady himself. The pleasure was so great, he was the one in danger of falling over.

Only pausing for the occasional breath, Eric worked Kane like no one else, not even his wife or Phil, had ever done before.

"Uh, you better stop..." Kane panted

Eric looked up at him and shook his head before resuming the sucking.

"I'm not kidding... I'm gonna explode." He didn't want to, but if Eric didn't let go of him, things were gonna get messy in a hurry. "C'mon, you don't have to... oh God!"

Eric had found the overly-sensitive spot on the underside of the head and was licking it gently. Kane let out a primeval shout, and emptied his load down Eric's throat. It was the most intense orgasm he'd ever had. (Including the debacle with Katie Vick!) When he was finished, he looked down, afraid he'd blown quarts of the stuff all over. Except for a little spot on Eric's cheek, there was no evidence at all.

"Now, tell me the truth, was I as good as Phil?" Eric asked, wiping the residue from his cheek on the back of his pants' leg.

"Better. I haven't felt that good since I was a teenager. I'll get you a blanket." Kane left.

Eric lay down on the couch, his mind racing. What the hell had he just done? Of all the people on the planet to have his first homosexual experience with, why did it have to be him? The more he thought about it, the more questions than answers were provided.

"Here." Kane tossed a quilt at him.

"Thanks." Eric replied, half-hearted.

"Havin' regrets?"

"I dunno. I'm just really starting to question myself." Eric replied "I never expected that to happen and now I don't know... I mean, I've always thought I was straight."

"If it means anything, I am straight." Kane answered

"So am I... at least I thought I was." There was something off with Eric, and even a non-rocket scientist like Kane could tell.

"This have anything to do with Matt and/or Jeff?"

"I want them both and I know they both want me. But I don't want them to feel they have to compete with each other." Eric's eyes shimmered "I've really fucked this up, haven't I?"

"We make our own choices." Kane philosophised "You just need some sleep. I'll see you in the morning."

---

"There's got to be an obvious answer." Matt idled at what had to be the longest red light in the state. "And we're just missing it."

"Mm-hm... skittle?" Jeff waved a bag of the candy under his brother's nose.

"No thanks. You know I don't eat those anymore. They go straight to my ass." Matt batted the bag aside.

"I know. Just buggin' ya." Jeff grabbed a handful and flicked them into the air one by one, catching each in his mouth.

The light finally changed. Matt didn't move. The people behind him started honking impatiently.

"Uh, Matt, you can go." Jeff looked over at Matt. He was staring off into the distance. Jeff knew this expression well. Matt was thinking hard about something.

"Kane lives around here, doesn't he?" Matt asked, still not moving. The cars behind starting swerving around him, drivers shouting obscenities as they passed.

"Yeah, but... ohhhhh...."

Matt pulled a U and started driving back the way they had just come.

"You think Eric would be that obvious?" Jeff asked

"I don't know and right now I just want some answers. Now hold on tight, things are gonna get bumpy."

**TO BE CONTINUED**

_Well, now that Eric's lost his cherry, it's time for him to figure it out... who does he want to be with... Matt? Jeff? Kane??? Stay tuned!!!!_


	6. Heads You Win, Tails I Lose

Since I haven't done it in a while... all characters are copyright WWE inc. I make no claims regarding any person's lifestyle or orientation. The only thing I get out of this is the accolades from those who read it, so enjoy!

Heads You Win, Tails I Lose

Eric was having a particularly vivid dream. He was trying to sleep, but kept getting awakened by someone kicking him. Only the kicking seemed to go on and on and on. After the tenth or so kick, Eric realized that it wasn't a dream. Someone really was trying to get his attention.

"Watch the ribs!" He opened one eye, preparing to rip whomever it was several new ones. His natural assumption was Glenn trying to wake him up for some unknown reason, but the faces he saw were anything but those of Kane.

"I think he's finally awake." Matt stated

It took a second for the sensed to fully kick in, but when they did...

"Glenn! You have intruders!" Eric yelled, covering his head with the quilt.

"I know." Glenn replied "How do you take it?"

"What?" Eric flipped the quilt back, completely ignoring both Matt and Jeff.

"Your coffee?" Kane stuck his head back through the pass.

"Black." Eric groaned, recovered his head.

"The old ostrich trick ain't gonna work." Matt said "Just because you can't see us, we're not gonna disappear."

Kane entered the den, carrying a tray with four cups of coffee, some pastries, as well as a large bottle of aspirin.

The smell of the coffee was too much for Eric to resist. He flung back the cover and swung his legs over.

"You didn't have to make breakfast. I wasn't expecting anything."

"Don't look at me. I just made the coffee. Matt and Jeff brought the food."

"We thought it would be a nice thing to do before we start busting your balls." Jeff helped himself to danish.

"You've already done enough to my ribs, can't you leave the rest of me out of this?" Eric held his side, which was starting to throb from all the abuse it had received.

"Sorry, but we need answers." Matt replied, sipping of the coffee. It was really black and very hot. Just the way he liked it.

"What are you now, detectives?" Eric sipped his coffee, then dry-swallowed four aspirin.

"Of course. Haven't you ever read the adventures of the Hardy Boys?" Jeff giggled

Eric stupidly slapped his forehead, increasing his headache threefold. "So, I should just call Matt Frank and you Joe, right?"

Kane chuckled over his coffee.

"You're just loving this, aren't ya big fella?" Eric cast an evil look in his direction. "I'm gonna get you back."

Kane replied with something that sounded like "I hope you do."

"Should I ask why you want to bust my balls?" Eric closed his eyes, hoping it would make everything a little less vivid.

"Oh, we think you know." Jeff retorted

"Let me guess. It has something to do with the fact that I am no longer employed by Titan Sports." Eric sneered

"That's part of it." Matt answered

"Well, let's see." Eric set his empty cup down and stared at the North Carolinians. "You want me, " He pointed at Matt. "you're not sure what the hell you want," indicating Jeff, "and you're just weird." He gestured toward Kane.

"Tell us something we don't know." Matt stated

"Okay, how about this...? There was no way I was going to pick either of you after what has been going on between the two of you since the Rumble. And don't give me that storyline bullshit. This was different."

Matt and Jeff exchanged glances. Had their change of attitude toward each other been that obvious?

"The only way I was going to have anything to do with either of you was to at least get some civility out of both of you. And it worked, thanks to my colleague and his ability to choke slam people."

"We knew it was part of the show." Jeff said

"And now you know why I want to play poker with you some time." Eric stated "You're soooo obvious."

"But that still doesn't explain why you never said anything about your release." Matt reiterated

"Honestly, if I had told you that I was going, would we be sitting here having this discussion." Eric answered "Besides, wrestlers come and go all the time."

"I thought we were friends." Jeff added "And friends don't leave without telling each other."

"Friends. One minute the two of you wanna do the nasty with me and now we're just friends... whassup with dat?"

Both Matt and Jeff shrugged indifferently.

"If that's the way you feel, I guess I'll go back to sucking Kane's dick."

Kane sprayed coffee all over himself, as well as the coffee table. Grumbling to himself, he went back to find something to clean up with.

"You too?" Jeff asked

"How many members of the company have you been with?" Eric demanded

Kane said something from the next room.

"What?" Eric yelled

"I said..." Kane returned with a cloth and began wiping up the wetness. "just Phil."

"...and me." Eric added

"And me." Both Matt and Jeff said in unison.

"And Mark, Dave, Chris, John..." Kane counted on his hand.

"Sounds like every Tom, Dick, and Harry to me." Eric snorted

"No Harry. There was a Paul, Shawn, Jay..." Kane ran out of fingers and shrugged indifferently.

"Maybe it would be easier to ask who you haven't been with." Matt laughed

"I think we're getting off-topic." Kane finished the wipe-down and threw the wet cloth out the door.

"Yeah. I'm starting to have icky thoughts about everyone." Eric shook his head, trying to chase said thoughts away.

"Then I guess I shouldn't tell you that if you do decide to go Hardy, Jeff is bigger... did I just say that?" Kane chortled

"You just said we're getting off-topic and now you drag us right back into it." Eric groaned

"Sorry." Kane mock apologized

"Not to mention you're lying." Matt said

"Who? Me or him?" Eric massaged his temples. What he wouldn't have given to go back to sleep. "On second thought, I don't even want to go there anymore. Those aspirin aren't working." Eric flung himself back into sleeping position, covering himself with the quilt.

"And no more arguing." His voice was a little muffled, but still understood by all.

Matt looked over. "I am bigger." He whispered. Jeff snickered

"I heard that." Eric moaned, pulling the blanket back from his face. "Just so I can get some rest, why don't you both just whip them out and we can settle this before my headache gets any worse."

"I'm kidding." He added hastily, when both Matt and Jeff made as if to stand. "I've been around enough dicks over the last while to seriously crimp my straightness."

"But Eric, I..."

"Listen, you two... it's not going to work. How would either of you feel if I chose the other one? Jeff, Matt, I know both of you have feelings for me and I'm flattered. But right now you both need to face the fact that even in a best-case scenario, one of you is gonna get hurt." Eric threw the cover back.

"You trust me to drive now, big man?"

Kane nodded, feeling uncomfortable being around drama that didn't involve him directly.

"Cool. Thanks for the breakfast and as much as I'd like to, I can't stay. I have to get home and start looking for a new job."

Without another word he left. While feeling for his keys in Kane's driveway...

"Hey bro, wait a sec..." Jeff had followed him outside.

"Huh?"

"I just wanted to give you this." He pressed a small card toward him.

"What's this?"

"It's the number for TNA. If you still wanted to wrestle, that is." Eric's stare made Jeff a little nervous.

"They lookin' for talent?"

"Always. Just don't mention my name. I'm sorta on the outs with them." Jeff traced a complex pattern on the driveway with his shoe, unable to look Eric squarely.

"Look, Jeff, it's for the best. There's no way I'm coming between the two of you. I said it earlier. You and Matt have got to work it out for yourselves. If one of you is willing to step back, maybe. But not right now... and you know I'm right, regardless." Eric tried to keep a stern composure, but even he could see the effect his words were having on the younger Hardy.

So engrossed were they, than neither noticed that they were being watched through the window.

"Matt, I'm no expert on dude love, but how much do you want Eric? I mean, do you love him enough to sacrifice Jeff?"

'I'd never do that!" Matt shouted "Jeff means the world to me!"

"Then maybe you should be the one to step back."

Matt looked at Kane, eyes narrowing.

"Who knows. Maybe things won't work out between them, but can't you see how badly this is hurting Jeff?"

Matt returned his gaze to the driveway. Something in his brother's stance made what Kane said believable.

"Dammit." Matt thought. The more he stood and watched, the more Kane's words rang true.

"Maybe we can get together sometime...?"

"If I didn't know better, I'd say you were trying to drag this conversation out." Eric stated "'Coz you're afraid that once I drive off, you'll never see me again... am I right or am I right?"

'Yeah. I guess."

"If it will make you feel any better, I promise I won't just walk away. I won't be around like I was unless the economy does a one-eighty and Vince rehires me, but Jeff we're still friends. You need something, call me. And that goes double for Matt..."

"Now who's the one draggin'?"

"Good point. I should go." Leaving him standing open-mouthed, Eric drove away from Jeff. If anything, he needed time to think. A lot of time, based on the activities of the past 24 hours.

THREE MONTHS LATER

Eric lounged in his bathrobe, a steaming cup of coffee in his hand and laughed loudly as the nonsense that passed for talk television.

"I guess they haven't run out of trailer parks yet." He commented aloud, watching a pair of anorexics 'discuss' the affair that one of them was having with the other's boyfriend.

"Now I know where Russo got some of his ideas... especially the bra and panties match... oh come on, let them fight!" Disgustedly Eric watched the fight end prematurely when 'security' temporarily separated the two combatants.

"We'll be right back!"

"I sure the fuck won't be." Eric sent the smiling face of Jerry into oblivion and went to change. As he had every morning, he glanced at the card on his dresser. Though he seriously needed the money, he still couldn't bring himself to call the rival company.

"Maybe later." Eric said to himself yet again. He hated this new habit of his... mumbling to himself. It made him feel a lot less sane. No sooner had he thrown on a shirt, then the doorbell rang.

"I swear if this is another Jehovah's Witness, I'm gonna snap." Eric shouted

The person on his doorstep was the furthest things possible from it, unless multi-haired, and tattooed was the new norm.

"Sorry, I already contributed to the home for wayward wrestlers."

"Okay, dude, later..."

Eric shrugged, closing the door. Not two seconds later, it was knocked upon again.

"Persistent, aren't you?" Eric addressed him yet again.

"I guess."

"Might as well come on in... you alone?"

"Yeah. Matt's back in Cameron." Jeff said

"You sure this is a good idea...?"

"No worries, man. Matt knows. He told me to come."

"Must be important. People don't usually come out here on a whim. Well, welcome to Chateau Stryker." Eric beckoned Jeff inside.

"Nice. A little soft for me."

"I guess that's why we'll never get married." Eric remarked "So, what's on your mind?"

"Y'know... stuff." Jeff's confidence disappeared instantaneously.

"Mm. Any chance of a little more specificity? I don't like playing guessing games."

"Y'know... STUFF!" Jeff repeated, a little more forcefully this time.

"Oh, stuff! Why didn't you say so?" Eric laughed "If there's something I know a lot about, it's stuff. Although I find having a drink helps when talking about a subject like that..."

Eric's phone vibrated.

"Oh, boy." Eric sighed. Like his visitor, the number was one he hadn't seen in almost three months.

"Help yourself to a drink or something, I gotta take this call." Eric stepped into his bedroom and took a deep breath before answering his phone.

"Is my brother there?" No hello, no how the fuck are ya, just right to business.

"Yeah, he's in the other room... Matt, what's going on?" Eric demanded

"I'll make this short. Much as I want to have a relationship with you, I'm not willing to hurt Jeff just for my own physical pleasures..."

"Okay..." Eric hesitated. Was Matt saying what he thought he was saying?

"It's taken me three months to finally decide what is important in my life and, no offense, but Jeff means a lot more to me than anyone else."

"None taken." Eric said

"Just promise me that you'll take good care of him. He can be a bit high-strung."

"But Matt.. I never said I was..."

"You don't understand. The last three months have been hell. I don't know how much longer I can deal with this. Jeff hasn't done anything except brood. He wants you so bad, it's tearing him apart." Matt said

Eric could hear his voice crack. This was hurting him as much as it was hurting Jeff, apparently.

"Matt, do you know what you're asking of me?" Eric demanded

"Please. I'm not saying you have to be his bitch, but just make him feel less alone. Other than me and Dad, Jeff's never had anyone he's connected to." Eric could hear the raw emotion in Matt's voice.

"I can't promise you anything, but I'll try."

"Thanks. I'll see you sometime." Matt hung up before Eric could change his mind.

"What the hell have I gotten myself into this time?" Eric stared at the phone. "Oh well, here goes.."

Eric walked back into his den where Jeff had sprawled out in Eric's favorite chair. After hearing Matt's passionate speech, he saw Jeff in a much different light. He did look miserable.

"Comfy?" Eric asked

"Sorta. That was Matt, wasn't it?" Jeff looked up. Eric noticed how tired Jeff looked.

"Yeah." Eric couldn't lie.

"He told you, didn't he?"

"Yeah." Eric repeated "Look, Jeff, Matt is just looking out for you, you know that, right?"

"I know. I just wish he wouldn't treat me like a kid all the time. I'm a big boy now."

"Jeff, he's just concerned. It's something that's engrained in his DNA." Eric leaned over the back of the sofa. "You'd do the same thing for him, right?"

Jeff's expression answered the question, though no words were coming out of his mouth.

"He just wants you to be happy, Jeff."

"Then why won't he let me? I finally find someone I want to have a relationship with, and what does he do... he takes him from me! Storyline or not, it's not right!" Jeff sniffled

"At first, I don't think anyone thought that Matt's feelings for me were anything but part of the show." Eric exhaled. This was proving a lot more difficult than he'd imagined. Things were getting more complex by the second, and Eric was still having difficulty understanding what was what.

"But..."

"Let me finish, Jeff, please." Eric finally sat. "Matt told me that he was stepping aside. Why? Because you mean a lot more to him that I ever will. He's throwing his obviously strong feelings aside because he cares a damn sight more about his baby brother's happiness than his own."

Jeff's eyes widened at this revelation. Obviously this was news to him.

"Now, as for me... I'm still not sure what you want out of a relationship, but I'm willing to try." With that, Eric hoped that he hadn't resigned himself to becoming a Hardy ring rat.

"You mean it?" Jeff squealed

"Yes, Jeff, I do. But we're gonna take it nice and slow, okay?" Eric answered "This is new to me."

"Oh, thank you..." Jeff jumped across the room and hugged Eric tightly. "This is like a dream come true."

"I just hope it doesn't turn into a nightmare." Eric returned the embrace. "Just watch my ribs, okay?"

"Okay." Jeff broke the hug. The look he gave Eric was one of pure adoration. For Jeff, it was like Christmas, New Year's, and his birthday all rolled into one, and for Eric, it was something completely different. You see, all his life he knew that something was missing, but he could never quite figure out what it was. Now he knew. It was a little thing called happiness.

**THE END**

_Well, there you have it... Jeff and Eric are finally together... if you would like to see the relationship progress, let me know and 'll write more. If you'd rather it ends here, that's fine as well. _

_And honestly, this one wasn't as good as I'd hoped, but I think managed to salvage a Phoenix from the ashes!_

_Till we meet again!  
_


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